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The Virgin Suicides
By James Woods, Kathleen Turner, Kirsten Dunst, Josh Hartnett, Michael Par?, Scott Glenn, Danny DeVito, A.J. Cook, Hanna R. Hall, Leslie Hayman, Chelse Swain, Anthony DeSimone, Lee Kagan, Robert Schwartzman, Noah Shebib, Jonathan Tucker, Joe Roncetti, Hayden Christensen, Chris Hale, Joe Dinicol
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Ok so this film is suppose to be about growing up in the mid 80's. In reality the lives that the teens lived really wasn't that different from most lives that teenagers live today. Especially Josh Hartnett's character, named Trip. He was such a badass, I mean at the age of sixteen, not only was he smoking dubs in his red Firebird, but at one of the school dances he brought a pint of peach schnapps.
Through out the entire move a group of teenage boys are trying to befriend the Lisbon sisters, five lovely girls ages 13 to 17. The girls parents are math teacher James Woods, and psycho religious bitch Kathleen Turner. As you can imagine Jesus does not want the girls to; listen to Kiss records, talk to boys, wear clothing that show the shoulder, and above all Jesus despises suicide. Apparently the Lisbon girls must have missed that sermon, because as the title of the movie states the girls do commit suicide. It starts with the youngest girl trying to slit her wrist, but hey she even sucked at killing her self. A few weeks later after some therapy from Danny DeVito, the youngest girl jumps out a window and lands on an iron fence post. Later in the movie Josh Hartnett starts going after the second youngest Lisbon girl, played by Kristen Dunst. Well Trip is some how able to convince James Woods to allow him and some of the members of the football team to take the girls to a school dance. Well at the dance, Trip is able to sneak out with his girl and he fucks her in the middle of the football field. So she is late, and mom gets pissed, so the girls kill themselves.
Life was so terrible for them, they didn't have any debts, or they didn't lose millions of dollars on the stock market, but I guess when you are a teenage girl, not being able to go the movies, must be a legitimate reason to kill your self. The one thing that I learned in this movie is that if you want to turn a girl into a complete slut, you need to follow these simple steps. Step 1: get the girl drunk on some peach schnapps. Step 2: take her to the middle of the football field. Step 3: fuck her until she passes out. Step 4: walk away as if nothing happened. With these simple steps it will turn any girl into a huge whore.
two thumbs down
Leong |
| | Posted 2/11/2007 2:38 PM - 67 Views - 2 eProps - 3 comments
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